The Role of Mediation in Alternative Dispute Resolution
Alternative dispute resolution refers to a family of conflict resolution processes intended to resolve disputes outside of the court system, including arbitration, mediation, negotiation and collaborative law.
A primary goal of alternative dispute resolution is to help the parties settle faster than litigation and, as a result, is less expensive.
Alternative dispute resolution involves creating a forum between the disputing parties where sincere discussions about the dispute can take place and common solutions can be found.
Alternative dispute resolution has become the method of choice for resolving disputes in different situations. These include personal injury, construction, workers’ compensation, domestic relations, and labour relations to name a few.
There are several types of alternative dispute resolution services for different situations.
Types of Alternative Dispute Resolution
Mediation: Mediation is a form of alternative dispute resolution where a neutral third party, the mediator, helps the parties reach a voluntary agreement. The mediator makes no decisions for the parties but instead helps with communication and helps the parties identify their interests and needs. Mediation is often used in divorce cases to help couples negotiate issues such as child custody, child support, spousal support, and property division.
Collaborative Law: Collaborative law is a relatively new alternative dispute resolution process involving a team approach to conflict resolution. Each party has legal counsel, but the lawyers work together to find a solution that meets the needs of both parties. For example, collaborative law can be used in divorce cases to address property division, spousal support, and child custody issues.
Arbitration: Arbitration is a form of alternative dispute resolution where the parties agree to resolve their dispute by a neutral third party, the arbitrator. The arbitrator listens to both sides and decides to bind the parties. Arbitration is often used in commercial disputes but can also be used in divorce cases to resolve issues such as property division and spousal support.
Negotiation: Negotiation is a resolution process where the parties try to reach an agreement through direct communication. Negotiation can be used in any dispute, including divorce cases. Sometimes, negotiation may be the first step in the alternative dispute resolution process, and if an agreement cannot be reached, the parties may move on to mediation or arbitration.
Workplace and Employment Disputes
- Wrongful Termination
- Discrimination
- Harassment – Bullying
- Grievances
Community and Local Government
- Public Bodies
- Environmental / Local Authority
- Local Community / Neighbour Disputes
- Property
- Landlord / Tenant / Rent / Leasing / Rent
Reviews
- Management Companies / Homeowners
- Builders / Sub Contractors / Homeowners
Disputes
- Building Construction
Commercial / Civil
- Commercial Disputes Between Companies
- Contracts Of Any Kind
- Partnership / Shareholder Disputes
- Debt Recovery / Creditor Disputes
- Loan / Bank Settlements
Medical
- Medical Malpractice
- Personal Injury
Sports Disputes
- Eligibility Rules
- Selection Criteria
- Contractual / Commercial Disputes
Family
- Prenuptial/Premarital Agreements
- Separation / Divorce
- Wills / Succession / Estate Disputes
- Spousal Support / Child Support
- Parenting Plans (Child Custody And Visitation)
- Eldercare Issues (Living Wills)
- Family Businesses
- Farm / Land Related Disputes
- Adult Sibling Conflicts
- Disputes Between Parents And Adult Children
Examples of alternative dispute resolution in society
Conclusion
Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) provides parties with various options to resolve their disputes outside of traditional litigation. By utilizing ADR methods such as mediation, collaborative law, arbitration, or negotiation, parties can save time and money and reduce the stress associated with going to court. ADR also allows parties more control over the outcome of their disputes rather than having a judge or jury decide for them. Overall, ADR can be an effective and efficient way to resolve disputes and should be considered a viable option for those seeking to resolve conflicts in a more peaceful and mutually beneficial manner.
Other alternative dispute resolution articles you may find interesting:
Mediation meaning in law
Mediation: A Closer Look
Mediation is an alternative dispute resolution process in which a neutral third party helps with communication and negotiation between parties in conflict. Mediation has gained popularity as a method of alternative dispute resolution because it is an effective way to resolve disputes in a confidential, flexible, and efficient manner.
The mediator’s role is to help the parties communicate, understand each other’s perspectives, and work together to find a mutually acceptable solution. The mediator does not take sides or decide for the parties but helps them explore their options and develop a resolution that meets their needs and interests.
The mediator’s role in alternative dispute resolution begins with pre-mediation discussions, where they explain the process and gather information about the conflict. The mediator may also establish ground rules for the mediation and ensure all parties agree to them before moving forward. The mediator may also conduct joint and private sessions with the parties to understand the nature and causes of the conflict.
During the mediation, the mediator helps the parties identify the underlying issues, clarify misunderstandings, and generate options for resolving the dispute. For example, the mediator may ask open-ended questions, summarize the parties’ positions, and reframe the points to help them understand and communicate. The mediator may also use active listening, empathic statements, and reframing to build rapport and trust between the parties.
The mediator also involves managing emotions and maintaining a neutral and impartial stance. For example, the mediator may help the parties manage their feelings by acknowledging them and redirecting the discussion to the underlying issues. The mediator may also help the parties separate the people from the problem and focus on the interests and needs rather than the positions.
Finally, the mediator’s role ends with drafting an agreement that reflects the parties’ agreement. The mediator may help the parties translate their understanding into a written document and ensure it is clear, complete, and enforceable. The mediator may also provide the parties with a copy of the agreement and encourage them to seek legal advice before signing it.
Mediation has several advantages over other forms of alternative dispute resolution. Mediation is voluntary, confidential, and informal, so the parties have more control over the outcome and can preserve their relationship. Mediation is also flexible and can accommodate the parties’ schedules and preferences. Mediation is also cost-effective because it typically takes less time and money than litigation or arbitration.
Mediation plays a crucial role in alternative dispute resolution by providing a safe, confidential, and effective way to resolve conflicts. The mediator’s role is to help with communication and negotiation between the parties, help them identify their interests and needs, and develop a mutually acceptable solution. Mediation has several advantages over other forms of alternative dispute resolution and can be used in various contexts, including family, workplace, community, and commercial disputes.
Mediation: A Closer Look
Mediation has several advantages over other forms of alternative dispute resolution. Mediation is voluntary, confidential, and informal, so the parties have more control over the outcome and can preserve their relationship. Mediation is also flexible and can accommodate the parties’ schedules and preferences. Mediation is also cost-effective because it typically takes less time and money than litigation or arbitration.
Mediation plays a crucial role in alternative dispute resolution by providing a safe, confidential, and effective way to resolve conflicts. The mediator’s role is to help with communication and negotiation between the parties, help them identify their interests and needs, and develop a mutually acceptable solution. Mediation has several advantages over other forms of alternative dispute resolution and can be used in various contexts, including family, workplace, community, and commercial disputes.
How can Mediation Services benefit me?
If you have ever wondered “what is mediation and how can it benefit me?”, this article explains all you should know.
First, let me describe mediation, it is an alternative way of resolving disputes between parties. It involves creating a forum between the disputing parties where sincere discussions about the dispute can take place and common solutions can be found.
The discussion in mediation is usually overseen and guided by a neutral third party known as a mediator. It is a voluntary process – this means that you can always withdraw from discussions if you are not comfortable.
Mediators are usually trained in the art of negotiation and have a good understanding of human dynamics. They have great listening skills, can articulate issues and make effective restatements.
The mediator does not decide for the parties. What they do instead is guide the process and let the parties come to an agreement. The settlement reached in a mediation process is not binding and if one or both of the parties is not satisfied with the settlement, they can go for another dispute resolution method. In most cases, this is where the parties go for arbitration.
Goals of mediation
A primary goal of mediation is to help the parties settle faster than litigation and as a result, is less expensive. Also, because of the rule that the cost of mediation is borne equally by both parties, there is a joint sense of ownership which makes it easier to reach an agreement.
Types of mediation within alternative dispute resolution.
There are several types of mediation services for different situations. Sometimes, parties may decide what type of mediation service they prefer, while at other times, their circumstances will determine how things proceed. The major types of mediation services include:
- Virtual/online mediation: This type of mediation has become very popular in recent times, especially due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Virtual mediation is conducted through electronic means such as video conferencing tools. It constitutes a handy compromise for when physical mediation is not possible.
- Mediation in chambers: This is physical mediation conducted with both parties and the mediator present in one physical location. It may also be conducted by a court judge in their chambers. For the purpose of this meeting, the judge steps into the role of a mediator.
- Court-ordered mediation/mediation order: Usually, court-ordered mediation involves a referral of the disputing parties to mediation by a judge. This often occurs when a lawsuit has already been filed and the parties are before the court. Where the judge believes the dispute is best settled through mediation, or if the parties agree to submit their dispute to mediation while the court case is ongoing, the judge may issue a mediation order. In such a case, the court case will be paused while the parties work with a mediator to resolve their dispute.
- Remote mediation: Remote mediation is somewhat similar to online/virtual mediation. In this case, the mediator and the parties could be in different locations, or the mediator and one party may be in one location, while the other party is at an entirely different location. Remote mediation is best for instances when distance makes it impossible or unnecessarily expensive for all parties to be in the same physical location.
- Telephone mediation service: A telephone mediation service is often offered exclusively over the phone. Here, the mediator does not handle physical mediation sessions at all. Their entire practice involves providing mediation services over the telephone.
Determining which is the best mediation for you may involve looking at your circumstances or your preferences. A professional mediator can listen to your story and help you decide on the best option.
Mediation meaning in law
Mediation before court
In law, mediation is a method disputing parties use to attempt to resolve their differences before going to court or without going back to court after a preliminary hearing. It is less expensive, less intensive and less time-consuming than the court process. The mediator is usually a professional who has been specially trained to help disputing parties find speedy, mutually beneficial solutions to disputes.
Lawyer assisted mediation
While the process is usually overseen by a mediator, both parties can decide to have their Lawyers present. It is usually advised that you discuss with your Lawyer or get independent legal advice before you go for mediation. The resolutions reached in mediation are usually written down in a Memorandum of Understanding or settlement agreement.
Why is mediation effective
There are many reasons why mediation is an effective means of resolving disputes. But perhaps the most important of all is that mediation gives parties a forum where they can truly listen to each other, understand the other’s position, and genuinely work towards a common solution.
Often, dispute resolution is about picking sides and doing everything possible to ensure one side wins. But in mediation, the goal is not necessarily to win but to resolve the dispute in the most effective way possible. As a result of this, resolutions secured through mediation are often more comprehensive, fairer overall, and more long-lasting.
Modern Mediation Techniques
There are two major techniques used in mediation. They are interest-based mediation and evaluative mediation. There is a third style, which is relatively new, known as transformative mediation.
Interest-based mediation is also called facilitative mediation, understanding mediation or assisted negotiation. Here, the mediator guides the process by asking questions, offering validations and getting the disputing parties to find resolutions that would work for them. The mediator does not make any recommendations or offer advice. What he or she does is to take charge of the process while leaving the outcome to the disputing parties.
Both parties may choose to have their lawyers present. The mediator encourages the parties to listen to each other and ensures that they have a fair opportunity to air their grievances. If need be, the mediator can meet separately with each side – a process known as “caucusing”.
Evaluative mediation is a bit like a settlement conference overseen by a judge. The mediator in this type of technique is known as an evaluative mediator. He or she helps parties to a mediation defuse the dispute by identifying the weaknesses of their case. The evaluative mediator also predicts what a judge or jury is likely to do.
Evaluative mediation is more concerned with a fair resolution of disputes based on legal concepts. It places the legal rights of the disputing parties above their needs and interests. Since an evaluative mediator needs to be an expert in the area of law relevant to the dispute, most evaluative mediators are lawyers.
The lawyers for both parties work with the court to choose the mediator, and they are usually very active participants in the process. Normally, the disputing parties are not placed in the same setting. They may be in the same building but different rooms. The mediator goes back and forth between them, presenting needs, concerns and offers
What does the mediation process entail?
In addition to the question “what is mediation?”, many parties also want to know what is a legal mediation process. While the process is largely case-dependent, there are general steps that will be involved.
The first step is agreeing to go for mediation after which both parties agree on a choice of a professional mediator. Having chosen a mediator, the next step is to sit with the mediator and work towards understanding the problem(s). Under the watchful eye of the professional mediator, both parties generate options that might lead to a resolution and then agree on one that satisfies both parties. When parties reach an agreement, the next step is implementing the agreement(s).
Advantages of mediation
Mediation has many advantages for parties in a variety of settings. These advantages include:
Mediation helps the disputing parties preserve their relationship. Taking a dispute through litigation can result in bitter feelings from both sides. Due to the consensual nature of the mediation process, parties can avoid situations that may make it impossible to continue a productive relationship after settlement.
The mediation process is not governed by strict rules and is as a result, highly flexible. This flexibility makes it advantageous to use mediation especially in complex cases that involve numerous issues. The parties can reach settlements that are more broad-based and exhaustive than legal remedies in court proceedings.
Mediation is subject to the Access to Information and Privacy Act. This makes it a private process and an ideal one for disputes where confidentiality is necessary.
Alternate Methods to mediation in ADR
Mediation is one of four alternative dispute resolution (ADR) methods. Alternative dispute resolution methods are legal methods for resolving disputes outside the court system. The other three are negotiation, collaborative law and arbitration. Of the four, mediation and arbitration are the most common.
Difference Between Mediation and Adjudication
Adjudication involves submitting a dispute to a court-supervised process. This is the usual way that many people try to settle their disputes. It involves filing a lawsuit in court, serving the other party with the necessary court papers, and going through an often technical, lengthy process.
Compared to adjudication, mediation is swifter, more collaborative, and creates a better opportunity for achieving a mutually-acceptable resolution. In court, both parties will be going at each other using lawyers, experts, and all the evidence they can find to ensure the other party loses. But in mediation, all efforts are directed towards the problem that is at the core of the dispute between the parties. The mediator, both parties, and their lawyers (if they wish to have lawyers present), will be working hard to find a solution to the dispute.
This is why mediation takes much less time, because it is less formal, and the focus is on finding a lasting solution to the dispute.
Difference between Mediation and Arbitration
Arbitration is a little bit like going to court and it has some elements which are similar to the court system. In arbitration, the parties hire a neutral third party to evaluate the dispute and decide on their behalf. The neutral third party is known as an arbitrator and there could be one or more arbitrators.
While it is not necessary, parties can decide to hire lawyers to help them present their cases before the arbitrator. The arbitrator listens to both sides, considers the evidence and makes a decision. Most times, the decision of the arbitrator(s) is binding on both parties.
Both mediation and arbitration cost less in terms of time, money and effort when compared with the court process. Mediation, however, takes less time and is more flexible than arbitration.
Why is mediation so important?
Mediation is a very important option for dispute resolution because of its ability to help parties resolve their real dispute. The warm, collaborative atmosphere it facilitates encourages parties to put away their swords for the time being and really interrogate the dispute.
With the help of a professional mediator, who is usually trained in identifying the core of the dispute between the parties and helping them see where their true differences lie, parties can solve their dispute better and more completely than a court-supervised process.
Another reason why mediation is an important option for dispute resolution is its versatility. I have mentioned above that mediation has become a dispute resolution method of choice in many industries and situations. But these are expanding by the day, largely due to the effective nature of mediation.
What does mediation mean to your dispute outcome?
The goal of mediation is to help you reach a complete resolution of your dispute. Central to this is helping you identify what the best possible outcomes are for you in relation to the dispute, and how this matches up with your goals for the process. Common outcomes in mediation are:
- Agreement between the parties. This is the best outcome for both parties. Although, it must be noted that this will often involve a bit of compromise on both sides.
- Failure to reach an agreement. Even in this case, mediation will still have proved very useful because it has brought both parties to the table, and helped you communicate. In many situations, parties find that they reach an agreement shortly after mediation due to their new understanding.
- Stopping the session before the end. This occurs in rare circumstances where either party or even the mediator, believes the mediation should end before conclusion. This may be due to several reasons including a severe power imbalance, threats to one party by the other, or other reasons that make it inappropriate to continue.
It is important to note that it is not in all situations that the available outcomes will completely align with your goals for the process. As mentioned earlier, mediation helps you identify the real issues in contention and work towards a satisfactory solution. You may find your goals inappropriate, impossible, or off the mark when you discover the real issue.
Power imbalances in mediation occur when either party wields a much stronger advantage over the other party. In these cases, continuing with the mediation session may result in bullying the hapless party or forcing them into an unfavourable settlement. Mere presence of a power imbalance will not render the mediation unfair though. An experienced mediator will be able to identify where a power imbalance exists and work to provide a level negotiating table for the parties.
What is mediation like?
It is advantageous to know what to expect during mediation and the critical items that make up the mediation process. When parties have agreed to go to mediation and select a mediator, they should draft out a mediation agreement. The critical issues the agreement should address include:
- The logistics of the mediation
- The mandate of the mediator
- The arrangement for payment and cost-sharing
- The confidentiality of the mediation
- The process to follow for financial disclosure – whether it would be in advance or required by the mediator
- Options for other dispute resolution methods if mediation does not work
How to start mediation?
Now that you fully understand the meaning of mediation, how it works, and its benefits, you must be wondering how you can begin. Mediation usually starts with identifying and retaining the services of a mediator. You can do this by looking for an online mediation service or visiting a mediation center near you.
When you meet with a mediator, they will explain all you should know about the process and answer any questions about the mediation you have. This will include questions about the best mediation for you, who has to pay for mediation, how long the process will take, and the mediation times that will be scheduled.
Generally, both parties to the mediation are expected to contribute financially towards the process. They will equally bear the cost of retaining the mediator and any other costs that are incidental to the mediation. As for how long the process will take, it may not be possible to tell this from the start. This often depends on each specific case and its unique circumstances. However, the process typically takes anywhere from a few days to a few weeks, depending on how fast the parties are willing to resolve their dispute.
Once you have retained a mediator, the next step will be to draft a mediation proposal letter. This letter proposes to the other party that the dispute be submitted to mediation. If the other party agrees, a mediation agreement will be drawn up. The agreement includes the terms of reference, and an undertaking to respect the outcome of the process.
The mediation process offers confidentiality. This means that everything you say at the session will be kept in strict confidence, and nothing you say may be presented as evidence in court. This allows both parties to fully engage in the session without worrying that any financial disclosures they make will be used against them.
But note that there are exceptions to confidentiality in mediation.
- Usually, courts allow evidence of what was said and done at the mediation in order to prove that an agreement was reached, or to prove the scope of the agreement.
- Another exception relates to matters that relate to child protection concerns. The welfare of children is paramount, and if necessary, inquiry will be made into what was said and done at the mediation session in order to protect children.
- Threats of harm to oneself or others during the mediation will also be an exception. Such threats must be taken seriously and reported to the police.
Overall, mediation provides a mutually-acceptable avenue to completely resolve disputes and find long-lasting solutions. If you would like to further explore the benefits of the process, or get started with a mediator, contact Divorce the Smartway for help today.
Conclusion
Divorce the Smartway is headed by Ken Maynard, a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) and Family Mediator. Due to this, he is uniquely skilled to help you reach an amicable marital separation.
Being a survivor of a court supervised divorce himself (twice), he knows what it feels like to be caught in the harrowing experience of divorce litigation. He has helped many couples reach financially equitable divorce settlements and fundamental resolution to long term issues.
With his capacity as a financial advisor and his wealth of experience as a divorce mediator, you are assured of a speedy and hassle-free divorce. If you would like to discuss the specific benefits of mediation to your situation or want to know how you can proceed with our mediation services, please contact us today.
Where to find a Separation and Divorce Mediator & other Neutral Professionals
If you feel my Soft Landing Divorce Settlement Method is not a good fit for you or my location is not convenient (and Virtual or Remote Location Mediation is not an option.) It is still vital that you mediate your separation and divorce. You can find a Mediator listed at following organizations:
- Ontario Association for Family Mediation
- Family Mediation Canada
- ADR Institute of Ontario
- Family Dispute Resolution Institute of Ontario (FDRIO)
Other Professionals working as Neutrals
How Alternative Dispute Resolution Can Save Time and Money in Your Divorce
When asked to “define mediate,” I ask do you want a say Soft Landing for your family or do you prefer to struggle to come to an agreement with your spouse about your separation? Don’t want to avoid the financial and emotional expense of hiring lawyers? Entering mediation could be the answer. Mediation for Separated Couples with The Soft Landing Method has many benefits read on and let me explain.
I’ve experienced my own separation and divorce, so I know what you’re going through. And as a mediator, it’s my job to make your journey back to a more enjoyable life as smooth a ride as possible.
My goal is always to help couples who’ve decided to call it quits on their marriage to reach an amicable agreement, so both spouses can move forward with their lives. Just some of the issues I can help you resolve during mediation sessions, include:
- Division of property and other assets
- Support payments
- Other financial matters
- Access and custody issues relating to children
The Benefits of Choosing Alternative Dispute Resolution in Divorce Mediation
A mediator is a highly trained individual who will sit down with you and your spouse and help you both discuss the way forward with your separation, so you can come to an amicable agreement.
The important thing to remember is that, unlike a divorce lawyer, mediators are neutral. They don’t take sides and they are not there to make decisions on behalf of either party. You won’t catch me or other mediators saying ‘you should do this, or offer that’. And mediators certainly cannot provide legal advice. Instead, they act as facilitators, helping spouses constructively reach agreements during conversations that are peaceful, not aggressive, and collaborative, not intimidating.
Most Ontario Mediators will have a background as a lawyer, psychologist, social worker or some other related profession, such as in the finance sector. These kinds of roles help Ontario mediators carry out family mediation by guiding separating couples towards ironing-out issues that could be standing between them and a mutually acceptable separation.
Choose to secure the services of a mediator.
But before any of this happens, you and your spouse have got to decide to forego the expense and emotional turmoil of the family courts – legal system, find a mediator and attend a mediation information session.
Choosing Mediation Instead of Litigation
One is confrontational, adversarial and ‘them versus us’. The other is conversational, collaborative, and involves both spouses sitting down and calmly talking things through.
If you like the sound of the former, you and your spouse are going to need to hire separate lawyers and go to all the expense of getting the courts to decide your family’s future. I wish you luck.
Choose the latter, and it will be you and your former spouse who are in control of the nature of your separation.
How Alternative Dispute Resolution Can Save Time and Money in Your Divorce
Less Expensive
Is mediation cheaper than divorce is a question I often get asked. And the short answer is yes. If you take the litigation option, you and your spouse are each going to have to hire the services of a lawyer and they don’t come cheap. Mediation requires just one mediator between the two of you.
Better Chance Of An Agreeable Outcome
Because mediation lets you and your partner control the nature of the separation agreement, you’re both much more likely to be happy with it, than if you leave it to a judge and lawyers to decide for you.
More Likely To Stay On Good Terms With Your Ex
Litigation can get nasty. After all, you’re paying your lawyer to get you the best possible settlement, even at the expense of your former partner. Contrast that with mediation which is a collaboration, where you both work together to come to a mutual agreement. You may not like each other much, but after mediation, you’re far less likely to hate each other than if you choose litigation.
Still Want Litigation?
Does your anger against your former spouse run so deep that you just want revenge? Are you scared that your hard-earned financial wellbeing will be threatened unless you have a hardcore lawyer fighting your corner? Maybe you don’t trust your ex not to try and get one over on you.
All of these issues can be resolved without resorting to litigation. Your concerns can be dealt with through negotiation and collaboration during Ontario Mediation. You’ve just got to want it. To control the anger that’s consuming you. Try to think rationally. See the bigger picture. Step back from the edge of the adversarial abyss that is litigation, and choose mediation.
How Can Mediation Begin
Once you’ve decided to mediate, you’re going to need to get your former spouse to agree to it too. Hopefully, you’ll still be on speaking terms because that’s vital to mediation. Be sure to pick the right moment. If the dust needs to settle after a recent falling out or disagreement, let it settle before suggesting you enter mediation.
You can do that by simply inviting your ex to join you for a coffee somewhere. During the meet-up, just say you think it’s time to talk. Make it clear there’s been time for things to settle down, and now it’s time to make decisions about the future. Then mention mediation.
If you can use an example of how someone you both know has used a mediator to smooth-out their separation, so much the better. This divorce mediation checklist could help you sell the benefits of mediation:
- Less expensive than lawyers, judges and courts
- Mediators help you make decisions that you are both happy with (judges can come to conclusions that please no one)
- Settlements reached through mediation usually last longer than court judgments
- Mediation will help you stay on better terms with each other
- Mediation is much quicker than litigation
Usually, when you lay out the cost implications of hiring lawyers in front of your spouse, mediation suddenly looks a more attractive proposition.
Here are some figures:
Going to trial will set each spouse back to the tune of $15,000 each in lawyers’ fees. And that’s just for a two or three-day trial. Most actually last longer and couples will incur extra costs along the way. It’s why you can expect to each pay over $54,000 in a high-conflict case.
Agreed To Mediate? Time To Choose a Mediator
Once you get the go-ahead from your partner to enter mediation, you should book an appointment as quickly as you can. But first, you are going to need to choose the right mediator. A good starting point is to ask friends or family for recommendations.
You can also call a family law lawyer as they are likely to have a list of mediators they can recommend. But you should always conduct research into mediators, ensuring the one you choose has been specially trained in mediation. Family Law Mediators will have received accreditation to mediate by The Law Society, so be sure to look or ask for evidence of this.
Also, seek the advice of a lawyer before engaging a mediator, so you get an idea of your obligations and rights ahead of your mediation sessions. One decision you will need to make before you start mediation is whether or not to choose Open or Closed Mediation
I am often asked how can a couple have a Good Divorce. So spent about 5 hours and wrote down the secrets to a Good Divorce and a Soft Landing for your family. I held nothing back, it is all I have learn in nearly 10 years helping separating couples.
Link to The Secrets of a Good Divorce – Guide
Open Family Mediation in Ontario
This means the information discussed and disclosed during mediation does not remain confidential and can be shared with other parties such as lawyers and courts. Your Ontario Mediator may well be required to produce a report outlining the nature of the mediation once it concludes.
Closed Family Mediation in Ontario
Any information revealed and discussed in these sessions cannot be used as evidence by either party should the separation need to be resolved in court. And the mediator is not required to report to lawyers or the court on how the mediation is progressing.
Whichever type of Ontario mediation you choose, be sure to thoroughly review any agreement that you and your partner reach with your Ontario mediator before signing it.
What To Expect During Mediation
There’s no great mystery as to what happens during mediation sessions. Quite simply, you and your spouse will sit down together with the neutral mediator you have both agreed to work with, and you will all discuss your concerns, wishes, feelings and anything else related to your separation. This is likely to include child custody, the division of assets and other financial matters.
In most cases, couples will choose to have one mediation session per week which will last for about two hours. Usually, between four and eight mediation sessions will be required to reach an agreement that’s acceptable to both spouses.
An outline of what’s covered in your mediation sessions could look something like this:
- MEDIATOR establishes ground rules and boundaries of the sessions.
- YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE tell your stories
- TOGETHER you identify issues and your options
- TOGETHER you talk about and consider possible solutions
- TOGETHER you come to an agreement
- MEDIATOR records the agreement in writing
Can A Mediator Do A Separation Agreement?
Your mediator will guide you and your spouse towards agreeing the content of your separation agreement, so it becomes a legally binding document that you are both happy to sign.
Why You Should Seriously Consider Hiring a Mediator
Of course, as the title of this article suggests, I’m likely to be in favor of you choosing mediation as a way to solve your separation issues. But there’s persuasive evidence you can find elsewhere that will prove just how effective mediation can be:
Mediation Puts You In Control -A Good Idea
Take the often thorny issue of child custody and Child Support. Who would you rather have decide your future on this, you and your former partner, or a distant judge in a courtroom who has very little idea of the kinds of people you are and the lives you lead?
Mediation Costs Less Than Litigation
It’s a point worth repeating. Unless you’re happy to let your separation break the bank and use-up money that could be better spent elsewhere, you should shun lawyers and litigation and choose mediation. Instead of paying two lawyers, you and your spouse can share the cost of hiring one Ontario mediator.
Mediation Is Usually Quicker Than Litigation
The legal system is notoriously slow, and the longer your case takes, the more it will cost you. Mediation is, however, a far quicker process that often means you and your spouse can reach an agreement in 4 to 8 weeks, as opposed to the months and sometimes years it takes to resolve litigation.
Mediation Respects Your Confidentiality
If your divorce ends up in the courts, your hearing will be held in public, so in effect, anyone can listen-in and hear about your separation circumstances. Mediation is a private and confidential affair which only involves you and your spouse plus the Ontario Mediator you have both chosen.
Such is the importance of confidentiality in mediation, that the legal system can only very rarely force mediators to testify in court regarding the progress made in mediation. And usually when mediation is finished, your Ontario mediator will destroy all their notes, so no evidence of what was discussed remains beyond what’s contained in your separation agreement.
Does Mediation In Divorce Work?
It stands to reason, if you and your spouse are the ones deciding your future during mediation, you are much more likely to abide by the results than if your course of action is decided by a judge in court during a 20-minute hearing.
Can you hire a Mediator?
Your path to an amicable separation may seem an impossible one right now, but do not underestimate the power of mediation. Ontario mediators are trained to guide you and your spouse through difficult situations towards that light at the end of the tunnel. Their experience and training means they can help you think of solutions that you might not otherwise have considered.
Is Entering Ontario Mediation Right For You?
Usually, the answer is yes. But there are two notable exceptions in which mediation is not recommended:
- If there is a history of violence or abuse between the separating parties
- If one partner is intimidated by, or afraid of, the other
Remember, mediation is a voluntary process, and either party can leave it at any time if they are unhappy with how things are progressing.
Mediation is about learning – during our sessions you are likely to learn potentially uncomfortable things that must be addressed before you can move forward.
Mediation is about listening – both spouses will get an equal opportunity to tell their side of the story during mediation, and both parties must be prepared to hear the other out.
Mediation is about the future – this is not the time to rehash all the bad things from the past. No one can change what’s happened, but you can influence the future.
Mediation will be emotional – there will be times you feel like crying, laughing or yelling. I’ve seen it all. It’s all part of the process of getting to an agreement that lets you both move on with your lives.
Where to find a Separation and Divorce Mediator & other Neutral Professionals
If you feel my Soft Landing Divorce Settlement Method is not a good fit for you or my location is not convenient (and Virtual or Remote Location Mediation is not an option.) It is still vital that you mediate your separation and divorce. You can find a Mediator listed at following organizations:
- Ontario Association for Family Mediation
- Family Mediation Canada
- ADR Institute of Ontario
- Family Dispute Resolution Institute of Ontario (FDRIO)
Other Professionals working as Neutrals
We help smart and successful separating couples create separation agreements with clarity and soft landings for secure futures in 4 meetings or less without all the lawyer created overwhelming conflicts, confusion and costs.
Have Any Questions?
Book a Call
Talk to Ken S. Maynard CDFA, a Soft Landing expert to come up with a strategy that works best for you and your family for free!
Contact Information
Ken S, Maynard CDFA
1.855.731.3500
647.360.3200
Ken Maynard CDFA, Acc.FM
I help smart and successful couples, create separation agreements with clarity and soft landings for secure futures, in 4 meetings or less without all the lawyer created overwhelming conflicts, confusion and costs. You can work with me by video conference or with a DTSW associate at any of our 6 DTSW Greater Toronto mediation centers, including | Aurora | Barrie | North York | Vaughan | Mississauga | Scarborough.
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Ken Maynard CDFA, Acc.FMhttps://divorcethesmartway.ca/author/wardman/May 23, 2023
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Ken Maynard CDFA, Acc.FMhttps://divorcethesmartway.ca/author/wardman/June 2, 2022
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Ken Maynard CDFA, Acc.FMhttps://divorcethesmartway.ca/author/wardman/June 1, 2023
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Ken Maynard CDFA, Acc.FMhttps://divorcethesmartway.ca/author/wardman/March 17, 2022